My Short Thoughts……

Funny how the smallest thing can trigger a memory, a moment in time forever frozen and embedded in your thoughts, soul, and heart…
As full of shit as most people think this probably sounds, I’m only 22 and have been through more life changing moments than most can fathom:
I hope anyone reading this isn’t so quick to judge, I wont stand for bullying and these are moments in my life I have chosen to share as part of an effort to move on. A series of blogs to reflect…
Where to begin…..

I was born to a 16 year old young woman whose story is her own and will not share (it is not my place) what I will say is, I’ve always had confusion on who to trust , who to like and who to call “family” when it comes to MY family. There’s a lot of unresolved conflicts among my mothers family given how I came to be conceived and come in to my family, the phrase “don’t ask don’t tell” comes to mind. I always questioned my place. I never had a real father figure….my mother came to meet my brothers father (my dad) when I was around 9 months. I acknowledged him as my father but we never had that close bond until my teens. A feeling of resentment and hatred was the norm for my father, he wanted my mothers full attention and could never understand why she put me first and as a MAIN priority.

When I was dating my fiancé it was always important to me to find a man that was the complete OPPOSITE of my father just not someone I wanted as husband, father to our future children and companion in life. Something I struggle with on the daily is my “daddy issues”,I guess thats anyone who grew up without a father feels right?

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